“You know horses are smarter than people. You never heard of a horse going broke betting on people.”

        — Will Rogers

“I guess cows aren’t into the four food groups, especially when they are two of them.”

        — Anthony Clark

“The Internet is a marvellous tool for finding solutions to problems I never had prior to the Internet.”

        — Unknown

“We don’t see things as they are. We see things as we are.”

        — Anais Nin

“There is only one thing more painful than learning from experience and that is not learning from experience.”

        — Archibald McLeish

“If you have a parrot and you don’t teach it to say, ‘Help, they’ve turned me into a parrot’, you are wasting everybody’s time.”

“My husband lets me have all the scrapbooking supplies I can hide.”

        — Unknown

“Life is not a matter of holding good cards, but sometimes, playing a poor hand well.”

        — Jack London

“Think like a man of action, act like a man of thought.”

        — Henri Louis Bergson

“Anyone who believes what a cat tells him deserves what he gets.”

        — Neil Gaiman

“A Platypus is a duck designed by a committee.”

        — Unknown

“UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity.”

        — Dennis Ritchie (1941–2011)

“Sometimes you just have to jump out the window and grow wings on the way down.”

        — Ray Bradbury

“No member of a crew is praised for the rugged individuality of his rowing.”

        — Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Flattery is all right so long as you don’t inhale.”

        — Adlai E. Stevenson

“A university is just a group of buildings gathered around a library.”

        — Shelby Foote

“Bore: A man who deprives you of solitude without providing you with company.”

        — Gian Vincenzo Gravina

“To many people virtue consists chiefly in repenting faults, not in avoiding them.”

        — Georg Christoph Lichtenberg

“Marriage is a book of which the first chapter is written in poetry and the remaining chapters in prose.”

        — Beverley Nichols

“Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once in a while, or the light won’t come in.”

        — Isaac Asimov