“Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.”

“The first time I see a jogger smiling, I’ll consider it.”

        — Joan Rivers

“There are only two kinds of [programming] languages: the ones people complain about and the ones nobody uses.”

        — Bjarne Stroustrup

“A leader leads by example, whether he intends to or not.”

        — Unknown

“A kiss can be a comma, a question mark or an exclamation point.”

        — Mistinguett

“When I was young, I used to admire intelligent people; as I grow older, I admire kind people.”

        — Abraham Joshua Heschel

“Someday humanity will defeat Skynet by installing iTunes and McAfee on it.”

        — Lowell (@howtogeek)

“If you chase two rabbits, you will not catch either one.”

        — Russian Proverb

“On this shrunken globe, men can no longer live as strangers.”

        — Adlai E. Stevenson Jr.

“Well done is better than well said.”

        — Benjamin Franklin

“Vegetarian: A person who eats only side dishes.”

        — Gerald Lieberman

“No matter what it is I’m doing, there’s always about an 85% chance I’m supposed to be doing something else.”

        — Caprice Crane (@CapricecCrane)

“We are all worms, but I do believe I am a glowworm.”

        — Winston Churchill

“If you trip over a pun in your speaking it’s not so bad but to intentionally jump on one is a true offence.”

        — Graycie Harmon

“The ABC’s of Life: Accept differences; Be kind; Clear your browser history.”

        — Caprice Crane (@capricecrane)

“I married beneath me - all women do.”

        — Nancy Astor

“He knows nothing; and he thinks he knows everything. That clearly points to a political career.”

        — George Bernard Shaw

“We cannot direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails.”

        — Bertha Calloway

“Young people need models, not critics.”

        — John Wooden

“Rewriting is an opportunity to find new ways of coding old bugs, as well as exciting new bugs.”

        — Unknown

“Never try to teach a pig to sing; it wastes your time and it annoys the pig.”

        — Robert Heinlein

Your success really depends on how loosely you’re willing to define the word “success.”

        — Caprice Crane (@CapricecCrane)

“This crash always occured with the Skype toolbar, speaking of malware.”

        — Firefox Developer, Linux.conf.au 2012